4 Years (more thoughts)

4 years ago today I was up before dawn after having barely slept through the night I was so nervous.    Nervous about surgery, nervous about getting (maybe) my k-pouch.  Nervous about my alarm not going off.  Nervous about how many sticks it would take to get an IV started. -- kinda like that old tootsie roll commercial "how many sticks DOES it take to get Katie???"

4 years ago I ate my last big salad.  I can't say I miss salad too often not being a huge fan of lettuce to begin with, but sometimes, yes sometimes I could go for a nice big salad.  Then I ponder whether its worth trying to coax lawn-mower clippings through my cath and PASS.

4 years ago I had my worst post-surgical experience ever.  I was given a drug to reverse the effects of morphine because of severe respiratory distress.  You don't want to be awake 1 hour after your insides have been rearranged.  I'm sure there's a post about that here somewhere but I don't even let myself remember it because....
some memories are best kept locked away.

4 years ago I said good-bye to my ileostomy (hopefully forever, but I doubt it.  I'll settle for 'til I'm old and gray).

4 years ago I lost my rectum.  I still struggle with that.  I'll make jokes about it, and I try to shrug it off and say I'm better off, and considering what I was living with I am.  I'm free of that horrible fistula and all crap - literally.  But, all things being equal I'd still rather poop like any other person in the world.

4 years ago I had my last surgery.  Hopefully my last surgery for a long, long time.

3 1/2 years ago I last saw my fantastic and kind surgeon Dr Remzi.  When asked when he wanted to see me again he replied "when you have a problem."  Dear Dr Remzi, I love you, I hope I never have to visit you again :)
1 year ago I stopped taking all my crohn's meds (Dr's Orders!)
9-10 successive "clean pouch" reports from Dr. Shen and I'm happy to say I'm practically Cleveland Clinic Free.    1 year annual visits only (hope I don't fall off the wagon!)

Happy Birth-day to my k-pouch